Beware of snakes - fuck sharks!!

At first I need to tell you that I’m drunked right now. Special offer today: Jim Beam Cola.

Special thanks in advance to the spellchecker!

What are you afraid of? Well, a lot of people are afraid of spiders, rats, sharks or snakes. But what would you prefer if you have to choose which fear do you have to fight with? Pretty easy answer to a friend of mine. He hates snakes and would rather jump from a skyscraper than being in one room with a cobra or an earthworm. 

Ok, let’s start with my new story. As I told you last time, I spent some time in Thailand few years ago. It’s Phi Phi Island again. We lived in a Bungalow which was circa 15 min by feet far from the party places. But it was not a regular way, it was a beaten path which led right through the jungle. Actually I’m pretty lazy and there weren’t any streets. Either you’ve walked or took the taxi boat. It’s kind of cool to go to a party by boat. Well, boat is a little bit overstated, it was a wooded nutshell. The next five hours are quite fast to tell. Drinking, dancing, kissing, drinking, drinking. When I told my friend that I go home, he was still in the party mode and stayed at the party. I walked home with a group of people and went to bed. Around seven o’clock in the morning it knocked at my door. I opened the door and I saw my friend completely wet and he looked like a breaded schnitzel with sand. “Who is him? The Man from Atlantis?"

Two hours earlier…

My friend went to the taxi boats and asked for a ride back to our bungalow, but the driver didn’t want to negotiate, so my friend laid on the boat and felt asleep. When he woke up the sun was shining, the taxi driver was gone and his watch was gone.

What would you do now?

A normal person would take the beaten path, but not my friend. His fear of snakes forced him to find another solution. He took his wallet and his cell phone in his left hand, lifted his arm upon the sky and swam through the gulf of Thailand back home. He paddled with one arm almost one hour to our bungalow, hurt his leg on a spiky stone and lost some blood. “Sharks? Don’t give a fuck! I would have killed this shark with just one clout. But these sneaky snakes? No way!” At least he made it. He has just forgotten to put his ID Card out of his pants. 

Please tell me your story about your “special” way back home after a party. Has anyone of you ever swum from a party??